The Less is More Project: Week 41 - Simplifying holidays and get-togethers

JSM, 2014

This weekend was Thanksgiving weekend for us Canadians, eager-people-who-cannot-wait-any-longer-to-stuff-themselves-with-turkey-and-pie.

And with special holidays come special challenges to simplicity. 

What are the traps? They are laid out before your company even shows up:

• You clean too much
• You decorate too much
• You buy too much
• You cook too much
• You stress too much

Once family and friends arrive, you already feel exhausted. You nonetheless keep doing too much:

• You haste too much
• You serve too  much
• You (still) clean too much
• You talk too much
• You eat (and drink) too much
• You worry too much

If you are the guest instead of the host, don't rest on your laurels! You face the same traps:

• You groom too much
• You buy too much
• You talk too much
• You eat (and drink) too much

No matter what side you're on, host or guest, chances are you will overdo something. It's all too much! What are you going to do in order to simplify this year?

This Canadian Thanksgiving has given me a foretaste of the holiday season to come. This will be the first time ever that I go through the holidays during a Less is More Challenge, which is sure to prove interesting. It will also mark my first contribution to the Simplify the Season calendar, an initiative by Bethany Rosselit, who kindly asked me to write a piece. I was delighted to accept, and will be writing alongside some "bigger names" than me, such as Seth Godin, Tara Brach, Joshua Becker and Leo Babauta, among others. For an early peek, click below:

Simplify the Season


WEEK 41 IN REVIEW

I made an early Christmas present purchase (buying early lowers stress!) Because yes, I will still give presents to my loved ones - presents were the one exception I had allowed for (although I will be more mindful in my choices, keeping everything reasonable). 

I also bought a throw blanket, for myself. It is now freezing at night here, and I get cold reading a book on the living room sofa. Instead of turning up the heat, I will use that wonderful blanket. Better for the environment.

Baking soda is my hair's new best friend. After using it for weeks (months?), I can testify that it works wonderfully instead of shampoo. However, my new experimentation with apple cider vinegar as conditioner proved far less conclusive. For one thing, it stinks! And I'm not sure it really conditions that well. I will have to give it a few more tries before I renounce though.

Your turn to share about your struggles and victories of the week! What did you resist? Did you donate or get rid of anything? Did you face any challenge? Please comment below! And...

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The Less is More Project: Week 30 - What to learn from camping, part II

Kejimkujik National Park. JSM, 2015

When you feel like you haven't mastered all the ins and outs of something, ... practice some more, they said.

I went camping again.

Primarily for fun, but I was also excited to see what it would teach me about minimalism this time.

I was haunted by a lingering question: why do so many people enjoy living with much less than they actually have access to? Why do people actively choose to "complicate their lives", as my grandmother would say, by leaving the comfort of their homes and putting up a tent in a place with no showers or fridges? Why sleep on the ground when you could be in your bed? Why sit in front of a campfire night after night when you could pick from dozens of TV shows?

Sure, many wonderful things come with camping (see my partial list here), but what about the discomforts? The national park campground we picked this time has no showers within walking distance, so you either have to drive to them or skip washing yourself altogether (better yet, go for a swim in the lake and hope it will suffice).

The silliness of material comfort occurred to me while I was washing my dishes by hand at one of the rare communal sinks. I thought of those "house hunting" TV shows where people claim they "need" a double sink, a king bed, and the washing machine on the main level. Need? Really?

This latest camping trip of ours was complicated by Mother Nature's vagaries. We were "blessed" with torrential downpours. Everything inside the tent became damp and everything outside the tent was soaked: for example, we had to wring our towels before using them. In the group of friends we camped with, everyone's tent had a leak of some sort. Waking up to a drip of cold rain on the face at 2 am is nobody's idea of a good night's sleep. Waking up to a loud bang when a branch the size of your ankle falls on top of the tent isn't much better (true story).

When came time to pack up and leave, it was still raining and not only did we get drenched... mud and pine needles stuck to everything. The tent was so dirty we had to put it up when we got home to hose it down. I can think of better ways to spend my time... especially when I'm tired after three restless nights.

Still... camping keeps its indescribable appeal. Why?

I think I found the answer during a canoe expedition on the river: 

Thanks of the hyper focus on basic preoccupations such as obtaining drinking water, maintaining adequate shelter, and keeping warm...


... camping annihilates existential angst.


Try it and tell us if it does it for you.

Kejimkujik National Park. JSM, 2015

Your turn to share about your struggles and victories of the week! What did you resist? Did you donate or get rid of anything? Did you face any challenge? Please comment below! And...

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The Less is More Project: Week 29 - A seasonal case of FOMO

Kouchibougouac National Park. JSM, 2015

Do you suffer from FOMO? This acronym stands for the “fear of missing out” on things interesting and exciting. There are various manifestations, causes and consequences to this phenomenon, but it seems to be compounded by the use of social media.

In my case, that fear of missing out acts predominantly during the summer. The reason is simple: our summers here are so short (snow until April, jackets + scarves + gloves in October) and so stingy in terms of warmth (evenings usually require long sleeves, and the water rarely gets past vivifying temperatures) that I want to make the most of it. 

Consequence, I often feel frustrated. There are so many fun things to choose from that I don't know where to begin... even if I was to limit myself to free activities. And that does not take into account the short window of opportunity offered by the nicer months to do work on the property. On a sunny day, I find myself having to decide between repainting the deck (which is overdue), writing a chapter (if I ever want that book to be a thing), taking the kids to the nearby lake or ocean, playing tennis with a friend, reading a good book, and many more options. 

It seems ridiculous to complain as I only work part-time in July and August (a choice I made in order to spend more time with my kids). Yet I manage to experience stress in the face of all the fun things (and all the responsibilities) I face. Why do I feel so pressed with time, and is there a way to regain peacefulness? This state of mind doesn't quite feel minimalistic! Any advice on how to apply the Less is More principle to our short Canadian summers? Knowing that I cannot spend it all backcountry camping?



Your turn to share about your struggles and victories of the week! What did you resist? Did you donate or get rid of anything? Did you face any challenge? Please comment below! And...

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The Less is More Project: Week 21 - Two questions, take two

Kevin Dooley, Flickr

Sitting on a long chair in the backyard with a book. Wearing shorts and t-shirt, yet not feeling cold despite the shade. Finally. I had forgotten how good this feels. 

Life can now happen both indoors and outdoors, without the need to change clothes. I have been waiting for this all winter. And in most parts of Canada, winter (i.e. freezing temperatures and the potential for snow) lasts from October to April.

I am alive again. Mother nature is alive too, as the birds and the budding leaves and our freshly planted garden all remind me. The bugs are also back, but I couldn't care less; I am happy.

It occurs to me that such weather, if it lasted year long, would make it so much easier to be a minimalist. It's perfectly acceptable to live in cramped quarters with few possessions when the outdoors can act as living space. Or if you can at least open the windows! I could thrive in a tiny house in warm weather - in the summer my favorite place to sleep is a tent, and my favorite place to eat is at a picnic table or even right on the grass or sand. But in the winter? Not quite as appealing.

How do you reconcile harsh weather with a minimalist lifestyle?

Two questions, answered

What would you do if money were no object, and if you had all the money and time in the world? Here are the answers I gathered, both on this blog and from conversations with friends:

• do a job that's actually pleasant
• work less
• start a meaningful business
• go back to school
• spend time with loved ones
• engage in favorite hobbies (reading, etc.)
• do nothing at all
• help others (less privileged people)
• keep the house under control
• travel
• pursue creative goals (writing, painting, playing an instrument, etc.)
• pursue athletic goals (training for a race, etc.)
• buy something simple that will improve quality of life (as opposed to buying something luxurious for the sake of buying or for status boasting)

Notice that no one mentioned acquiring big, expensive things. Perhaps it's a sign that many of us are already minimalists at heart, and that stuff is not what we think of when the sky actually becomes the limit.

Also, notice how no one mentioned completely overhauling their life, like divorcing, moving to another country, or the like. Perhaps it's a sign that most of us are not miserable with our life; we might have some areas of "under-fulfillment", but a few small tweaks might do the job.

Let's go back to the list above, and to your specific answers. Is there anything you can do, in this life, to get closer to the accomplishment of those "dream goals"? Are they entirely unattainable, or can you slowly start making your way toward them? Of course, it will require thinking outside the box, getting out of your comfort zone, and perhaps some sacrifice... but it might be worth it! 

In what ways are you making room in your life for those "dream goals"?

Two new questions for this week

Decluttering is a daunting task. Simple tricks can make it more manageable. For example, looking for one object to ditch in each room (what we did last week), or tackling just one drawer at a time. To make it easier to part with your stuff from an emotional standpoint, here are two questions you should ask yourself when unsure whether to keep an object or not:

1. do you use it on a regular basis?
2. does it spark joy?

An object you don't use on a regular basis can probably go. (With the exception of seasonal items: if you only use your camping gear in the summer, and your fondue set in the winter, you can still keep them, provided they are used at least a couple times a year.)

An object that does not spark joy can probably go too. There is no reason to keep something that does not provide you with a significant positive feeling. It will only gather dust, or fill storage space. Say goodbye!

Look through your things and tell us what objects you got rid of based on those two questions.

WEEK 21 IN REVIEW

Temptations

No temptation this week either. However, vacation time is approaching fast, and we will be traveling, both to big cities and small, cute, historic places. Remaining focused will certainly be a challenge. Better start thinking about it now in order to come up with strategies!


Donations (good riddance)

I had a semi-formal outing, which hadn't happened since the beginning of this challenge. It took me quite a while to decide what to wear. It forced me to reassess the clothes I possess that are more "chic". I got rid of a few pieces. 

We also got rid of yet another bag of toys. The kids are moving into pre-teen years and it shows.

I tackled the bar this week. I realized we very rarely drink our strong alcohols, even when we have company: most people seem to stick to wine and beer. The unopened bottles have thus moved to my "regifting shelf", the one I browse whenever I need a hostess or teacher gift. The opened bottles have moved to a more convenient location, so that I will remember to use them (summer cocktails, anyone?) Once they are empty I will probably not replace those bottles.


Observations and cogitations

It's confirmed: I hate gardening with a passion. It's weird since I usually enjoy the outdoors very much, appreciate a pretty yard, and love harvesting from our veggie patch and berry bushes. But how I despise doing the work! 




Your turn to share about your struggles and victories of the week! What did you resist? Did you donate or get rid of anything? Did you face any challenge? Please comment below! And...

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